Describing a Character (STEAL)

British & IGCSE › Checkpoint 6 English (Cambridge Primary 0058)

1. What is character description?

Every story needs a character the reader cares about. Characterisation is the way a writer shows what a character is like: their personality, their feelings and how they change. In Paper 2 (Fiction), your characters help you earn Creation of texts marks (an engaging, believable story) and Vocabulary and language marks (well-chosen, imaginative words).

There are two ways to describe a character:

Indirect characterisation is almost always stronger in a story, because the reader discovers the character for themselves. A small amount of direct description is fine (‘He was small for his age’), but the personality should be shown.

2. Features: the STEAL method

STEAL is the tool for showing a character. Each letter is one way of revealing personality.

3. Show, don’t tell

Instead of naming a feeling or a personality trait, show the evidence. The reader then ‘sees’ the character.

4. Imagery for characters

Imagery (similes, metaphors and personification) makes a character unforgettable. Choose a comparison that fits the personality you want to show.

5. How to build a character — step by step

1. Decide one main impression. Before writing, choose two or three key traits (for example: shy, clever, secretly brave). Every STEAL detail should support them.
2. Choose one stand-out look. Not a passport description (height, hair colour, eye colour…). One detail that says something: glasses that keep slipping, a patched shirt, a whistle always round his neck.
3. Give the character a voice. One or two lines of speech that sound like THEM. A shy character murmurs. A bossy one gives orders.
4. Show a habit or action. A small, repeated action is easy to remember and can return at the end (Karim pushing up his glasses).
5. Let others react. How the other characters treat your character tells the reader a lot — and it can change during the story.
6. Let us inside their head. One or two thoughts, especially at the most difficult moment.
7. Show change at the climax. The best stories reveal a hidden side of the character, or show them changing: the shy boy is brave, the bully is kind, the selfish girl shares.

6. Building blocks: mix-and-match sentences

7. Short character sketches to study

Each sketch uses only some STEAL tools. Spot which ones before you read the label.

• The old fisherman (Looks, Actions, Effect on others): Amm Mahmoud’s skin was brown and creased like an old leather bag. Every evening, he sat on an upturned bucket by the harbour, mending his nets with fingers that never stopped moving. The young fishermen always asked him about the weather, and they never sailed if he shook his head.
• The strict coach (Looks, Speech, Effect on others): Coach Hamdy wore the same red tracksuit every day and a silver whistle that never left his neck. “Again,” he would say, after every mistake. Nobody argued. Even the tallest boys stood up straight when that whistle flashed in the sun.
• The nervous competitor (Thoughts, Actions): Salma read her speech card for the hundredth time. What if I forget every word? The card was crumpled and damp in her hand. When her name was called, she stood up so fast that her chair fell over.
• The bully who is not what he seems (Speech, Actions, Thoughts): “Move,” Tamer snapped, shoving past the younger boys at the canteen. He bought three sandwiches. Later, behind the sports hall, he gave two of them to his little brother. Nobody can know, he thought.
• The kind shopkeeper (Speech, Actions, Effect on others): Amm Fathy’s shop was tiny, but it was never empty. “Pay me tomorrow, my son,” he would say, waving a hand. He knew every child’s name. On the coldest nights, the street cats waited by his door, because they knew he would come out with a bowl of milk.

8. Useful phrases and vocabulary

9. Strong sample story

10. Common mistakes and checklist

11. Practice

1. Why does the author write that Karim pushed up his glasses ‘as if he were checking that the world was still there’?

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   Possible answers: to show a nervous habit, so we understand Karim is anxious on his first day · to make him seem careful and thoughtful · to create a memorable, slightly funny picture of him · to set up the habit that returns in the last line (circular ending) · to make the reader feel sympathy for him.

2. Why does the author put ‘Except Karim.’ in a paragraph on its own?

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   Possible answers: to make Karim’s action stand out as the turning point · to create a pause and suspense before we see what he does · to show the contrast between Karim and everyone else, who froze · to surprise the reader, because the shy boy is the one who acts.

3. Find one example of each STEAL tool in the sample story.

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   Speech: “Hello,” he murmured. Thoughts: Keep calm, he told himself. Effect on others: the boys stood in a silent circle, staring. Actions: he folded his jumper into a pillow. Looks: glasses that kept sliding down his nose.

4. Change these ‘telling’ sentences into ‘showing’ sentences: (a) Omar was lazy. (b) Aunt Nadia was generous.

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   Possible answers: (a) Omar’s homework lay untouched while he scrolled through videos for the third hour. (b) Aunt Nadia never visited without a bag of sweets for every child in the building.

5. Write a two-sentence sketch of a grumpy neighbour using only Speech and Effect on others.

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   Possible answer: “Keep that ball away from my car!” Mr Gamal barked from his balcony. Every child in the street grabbed the ball and disappeared in seconds.

6. Practice task: ‘Write a story about a character who surprises everyone.’ Write a short plan with STEAL notes.

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   G.C.S.P.P.: realistic fiction · Hassan (quiet, always at the back of the class) and his classmates · a school talent show in Giza · third person · whole story. STEAL — Looks: oversized blazer, eyes on the floor · Speech: one-word answers · Thoughts: ‘Nobody expects anything from me’ · Effect: classmates forget he is there · Actions: secretly practises the oud every night. Plot: (1) talent show announced, Hassan does not sign up · (2) a performer is ill · (3) the teacher asks for a volunteer · (4) climax — Hassan walks onto the stage and plays, the hall falls silent · (5) ending — people now greet him in the corridor, and he looks up when they do.